Phoebe

I'm sorry, but I really don't like the "cash split" thing. While I understand that it's encouraging giving to charity, it completely takes the baby shower out of the whole picture. Guest go online and donate - there is no picking out something, nothing tangible or concrete which is the point of a baby shower. Plus, it sort of says, "give me cash," even when that isn't the intention I'm sure. I can't exactly put my finger on it, but something about it just doesn't seem...genuine.

If you want to encourage giving, I'd far prefer to see "please no gifts." But don't try and divert the guest's money to another source, if you don't want it then don't invite them to a baby shower in the first place.

Some people really like the impulse to turn away from getting presents and send the love to a charity. But that is the thing, if the people want to give to a charity they will. You don't need to feel self satisfied that you "gave" instead of received. I find it tacky when people tell you right down to the model number what they want. I think I am not along, others have found this tacky as well, but then glitter kitten feels the same way I do about baby showers. They are more of less tacky. And that is unfortunate. Especially when they have such a wonderful opportunity to be special.

I remember a friend in school who would ask for pet food instead of gifts and then she would take it to the animal shelter.

For me that is a little bit different, she didn't ask people to give money to either her or to a select few charities. She wanted pet food. Ok, I was glad since seriously with what teens like it could have been pricey for my small budget. But it also didn't push. Some kids would bring bags of dog food. Others would just bring a can of cat food.

At the end of the party she would have a nice pile.

She was happy, her friends had a good time, and some homeless pets would get to eat.

I feel like anything that has do with asking for money for a charity is kind of tacky and I am off-put by it. If it were totally altruistic and asking for donations well I would bite the bullet.

Yet, even implying parameters for gifts, especially cash, seems weird. I would buy a gift in that situation.